My whole crew

Sat, 13 Nov 2004 00:48:08 GMT

I got tha rolly on my arm and I'm pourin' Chandon and I roll tha best weed 'cuz I got it goin' on.

When i grow up, I want to be a rapper.

Or would that be rappress? Considering I'm female and all? The world is full of so many unanswered questions.

Peace out.

Mon, 25 Oct 2004 13:01:47 GMT

I am so beside myself right now I don't even know what to do.

You know what I hate? Nosey people. People who feel it's their job to tattle on everyone for whatever reason. Come on guys, that is so fourth grade.

Someone, of whom I do not know... yet, has decided to print the lovely pages of my journal out and show them to someone I care about deeply. Why someone would do this to me is unknown, but the damage has been done.

There is no other guy. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but my heart only belongs to one person. You know who you are.

Whoever took it upon themselves to print this out and show it to him OBVIOUSLY has NO KNOWLEDGE of my life at all. 'Pete' is one of my good friends. Not a boyfriend. Not even a person I look at in that type of way. Sort of like a big brother. Someone who looks after me when everyone else turns their head. But no, everyone just assumes it's someone else. Someone in the school who I'm now madly in love with. You're wrong. You're so fucking wrong it's pathetic.

Thanks to this unknown person, I doubt I will ever get back what I truly want. So I thank you dearly, from the bottom of my fucking heart.

I can't even believe how immature people are sometimes. Maybe that's why he's not calling me now. Maybe that's why I feel the way I do now, like nothing will ever be the same. Maybe that's why stupid people should keep their stupid mouths shut.

You know I fucking love you.

Tue, 19 Oct 2004 14:15:41 GMT

Everything you did, you did for my own good. I just can't see it yet.

I love you.

Wed, 13 Oct 2004 13:14:26 GMT

New layout.

Let me know what you think.

Wed, 15 Sep 2004 14:45:00 GMT

Ugh. Right now I am at the local maximum-security penitentiary, which in recent years has changed names to 'Ichabod Crane High School', bored out of my mind. And pissed off. I can't forget that one.

Arrival: approx. 7:42AM [Just in time for the late bell to sound to tell me I had better get my butt in homeroom or face the concequences.]

Get into homeroom to discover that we have an assembly at 9:15 on "decision making" in store for us little hellions. Thus, our first and second block classes are cut short by half the period. Delighted to hear this [I always leave at the end of 1st block (9:15) and don't come back until end of lunch 5 (11:20) because I have Studyhall] which meant I would be going home at 8:40. Yay.

Excuse myself to the lavatory from 1st block [Trigonometry], and call my mom to tell her the good news. BadIdeaLikeWhoa. She got all pissed off because it's 8:10 in the morning on her day off and I woke her up. Despite my pleas of "I'm sorry, I forgot!!" she forbid me to a.) call her at that un-Godly hour again and b.) leave school at all. I told her that was ludicrous and I would be leaving school when it was time for lunch. For some reason she still insisted on telling me "No, Natasha, you will not be leaving. Don't call me again while I'm sleeping. Goodbye." Can you believe her?!

So here I am. In study hall, bored as h-e-double-hockey-sticks. Actually, I just discovered the crayola website and have decided to color a few pictures to cheer myself up.

I hope everyone elses school-day is going better than mine.

<333

F*cking A

Thu, 12 Aug 2004 19:37:35 GMT

How seriously ridiculous could my life get right now? LET ME TELL YOU.

Fucking Moms. DEFINATELY can't live with them, [obviously] can't live without them [they did give birth to you, which is why you can read this].

Pete's on vacation [for a day] so I needed a ride to work today. I wake up, get ready, and ask my mom to bring me to the Diner. [[Laugh at me all you want. I work at a Diner. I'm proud of it. And I bet I make more than you. :D.]] She yells at me all the way there b/c "I should be asking my friends for rides rather than relying on her" for ONE DAY of driving.

[I'm thinking 'That probably wouldn't be a problem if I had any friends.']

When I try to explain this to her, along with the fact that Pete is away, she just launches into her infamous "Maybe a night of staying at home will teach you not to ask me for anything" speech.

[I'm thinking 'Because having two jobs allows me any free time, anyways.']

Get to work. Have an unusual Thursday lunch rush (dead until 1:30, when we get SLAMMED, when I'm just about to be off the floor.) The place calms down at around 2:15-2:30, and I call my mom to come pick me up. Whoa. BIGMISTAKELIKEWHOA. She's twenty minutes away at my Aunt's house and yells at me to find another ride b/c she doesn't care that I need to get home before I go to my next job at 4:30. I ended up having to call my boss at my second job to bring me home. We listened to rap and smoked cloves while I ranted about my mom the whole ride home.

[I'm thinking 'Thank God for Dimitri.']

Now I'm home, and have no ride to work later, which kind of sucks. It's raining pretty hard. My room seriously needs to be cleaned. I have no exciting non-work life. The hair-dye hardly worked from yesterday, there is still red. I'm out of cloves. I have to work 9AM-11PM tomorrow, when I'm supposed to have Friday's off. I have no plans for tomorrow night after work. I'm such a loser. And it's still raining pretty hard.

[I'm thinking 'This day really sucks.']

Wed, 11 Aug 2004 19:28:19 GMT

I'm dying my hair right now. I got sick of the red and I've been trying to dye it back to my normal color for so long now but it just will not go back ! Ugh. We'll how this goes soon enough.

Anyways.

Pete picked me up after work Saturday (was it Saturday? Oh God, I've been working so much I can't even keep up with what days I worked and what days I didn't) after he went running and he started showing signs of a cold. Now I have a sore throat. And I can't eat hard food. So here I am hungry and sucking on ramen noodles <333.

I went to Macy's yesterday for about twenty minutes and spent about 300 dollars. bought the SIGNATURE DOONEY & BOURKE handbag and a bottle of Chanel Allure. All in twenty minutes.

Yay. I get to wash the dye out right now.
---
Nope. No difference. Jesus this is ridiculous.

I do nothing with my life as of right now besides work and sleep. I wish that would change.

I'm trying to find some new kind of healthy/non-poisonous food to feed to Luscious and Killer II. I know they loved the cucumber when I gave them that, but they don't have any nutritional value for hamsters. Hmmm... What to do, what to do?

Bored with my life so...

Mon, 19 Jul 2004 02:29:45 GMT

Tell me a secret.

Something juicy. Something entertaining. Something exciting.

Come on. Make me happy.

I like it like that.

BIRTHDAY

Fri, 25 Jun 2004 18:28:34 GMT

So today is my birthday, which sucks.

My boyfriend didn't remember it. :'(

Pete did make me a cake and brought it over to me though. We went ate it and played with confetti.

Mmmmm... french vanilla cake. I think I'm going to have another piece.

Went to town today and bought shimmer pink eye liner. I'm going to try it out tonight.

Obviously a very exciting day.

Fri, 25 Jun 2004 02:05:15 GMT

BIRTHDAY LIST\\
[+]A birthday card.
[+]Dinner with my mom who never spends time with me.
[+]For Chris to be out of the house for good. No more of this living here, not living here nonsense.
[+]Lingerie.
[+]A Lois Vuitton MURAKAMI handbag, because they're pretty. :D
[+]Money for a car. (I promise I will start saving it instead of spending it.)
[+]A pair of turquoise, steel heeled Steve Madden pumps.
[+]Happiness (I know, I know. You're asking for too much, Natasha.)
[+]A nice, fat gift certificate to Sephora.
[+]To be told 'Happy Birthday' by someone.

We'll see how this works out tomorrow. :/

Fri, 18 Jun 2004 00:30:33 GMT

ASK ME SOMETHING.

Don't be shy! Ask me anything. Go on, I dare you.

NYC & I, reunited.

Sat, 12 Jun 2004 14:43:06 GMT

Ah. Braid was so amazing.

However...

When we first got down to the city, we went straight to my mom's locker room and the security told us we weren't allowed in there (even though I've been going in there since I was 8 years old), which was a load of crap. Blah blah balh, we finally figured out what to do.

So it's about 5:30, the train got in at 4:40, and the show doesn't start until 9. Neither of us is hungry, so we go to H&M for a little shopping. Oh God is that place huge. I think it's something ridiculous, like four stories high of pure shopping goodness. We spent about an hour or so in there, and then at around 7 left to drop our shopping goodies off with the rest of our luggage.

Ended up in Chelsea before we knew it. We just kept walkng up 7th Ave. and as I turn my head, I realize I'm looking at FIT (Fashion Institute of Technology <333), therefore realizing, we've been walking for a while.

Went to Bellanapoli for stromboli and pizza, and it was very yummy. I couldn't eat much though because I was so excitied/nervous about Braid. Which brings me back to the reason I created this post:

Arrival time at the Bowrey: 8:15. Walk over to the park until 8:30, when we can go in. Had to buy new tickets because the ticket box "lost them". Paid another $30 for the tickets.

SHOW EVENTS & COMMENTS//
Murder by death (9:00)- Better than I expected.
Minus the Bear (10:00)- Pretty good.
Met this guy from L.I. (10:45)- Name was Chris. Talked about his family.
BRAID (11:00)- FUCKING AMAZING.

You just had to be there for the experience. Seeing such a great band get back together was just a-m-a-z-i-n-g. I can't even explain it. It was something i'll never forget.

And I still haven't caught up on the sleep that I lost that night.

Sun, 06 Jun 2004 16:15:13 GMT

BRAID TONIGHT.

Yay.

Who's excited? I know Noelle and I are.

I can't wait.

Thu, 03 Jun 2004 01:26:50 GMT

Confess something to me.

Right now.

And make it interesting.

Tue, 01 Jun 2004 15:52:05 GMT

NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE
NEGATIVE NEGATIVE NEGATIVE

?

We'll soon find out.

Thu, 27 May 2004 23:16:30 GMT

Oh god. Basketball is definately one of the most challenging things I've ever tried in my life. All I know how to do [correctly] are and dribble the ball. And I can't do them at the same time. Dribbling alone requires my full concentration! However, since Tuesday, I have managed to walk and dribble with the ball, but it's still difficult. :/

Any pointers?

Wed, 26 May 2004 01:40:21 GMT

Feel free to tell me anything that may or may not make my day a little less boring.

Please?

xxoo

Sun, 23 May 2004 23:42:22 GMT

New layout.

Thu, 20 May 2004 19:37:13 GMT

Jake Gyllenhaal to play Harry Potter in upcoming HP movie?!

Has anyone else heard this?

If it's true I think I will faint with desire.

Wed, 12 May 2004 00:58:31 GMT

Juddy got suspended for the rest of the year.

He can only go to school every other day for two classes and he has to be escorted everywhere. And he's graduating this year and going to Columbia Greene next year.

:(

No relationship of mine can ever work out nicely can it? No. It always gets fucked up just when I think things are starting to look on the bright side.

Oh, and now he's suspended, we can't go to prom. Double-sad-face. :(:(

I'll be happy as long as he's not taken away from me permanently , for those of you who know what I mean by that.

Thu, 06 May 2004 22:39:29 GMT

Ah. What a friggin day. Started off good, went to Stwearts and got a lollipop and coffee- like every other morning, got to homeroom on time, saw my boyfriend, got into a fight with my boyfriend, and went to first period studyhall. After, I got up to leave for my next period, which was gym.

I refuse to play gym for the rest of this year. LET ME TELL YOU.

Got changed, grabbed a lacrosse stick, and headed outside for a warm-up run around the track. When the class was done, we all gathered in the field for our FIRST GAME OF THE LACROSSE UNIT. It was going pretty well, I had no idea what I was doing when I was out there, but none-the-less I was having fun. Then all the sudden, I watch this guy in my class grab the ball and run with it, and run towards my goal of which I was a defendant of. Next thing I know, he has shot the ball as hard as possible into the goal. Only thing was, I was in it's path.

The damn ball hit me square in the face. I watched that thing smack into me at, what seemed at the time, the speed of lighting. I remember my face going completely numb with pain and my teacher running over to me and me falling onto him.

Got taken to Albany Med. after I was brought to the nurse at the school. She called my mom and told her to bring me to the emergency room.

My mom came, brought me to AMC (to the ER) and we (surprisingly) got treated very quickly. I have a contusion to the face, concussion, black eye, swollen face, crooked nose, and fat lip as a result of some asshole jock in my class. ALL ONE WEEK BEFORE PROM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holy Jesus, what a day.

Fri, 30 Apr 2004 19:13:06 GMT

I'm going to start this off by saying this:

I hate liars.

This is so typical

I finally get what I want in life. Happiness. And because of people who lie, to save their own asses, it's being taken away.

Something I found interesting today: "Trust exists only when there is honesty. Honesty exists only when there is vulnerability. Vulnerability exists only when there is love."

I trust him. Does that mean I love him?

:/

Tue, 27 Apr 2004 01:42:21 GMT

Oh my holy jesus. What a month. Horror story followed by horror story. My life is crazy. No point to anything. Nothing is right. My mother is crazy. She's supposed to be getting a divorce from my step-father but she just snuck out of the house to see him. What has this world come to when the Mother is sneaking out and the DAUGHTER is worrying about her??!!

PS: I know I haven't updated in... forever, but I'll try to keep up with this thing.

Hope everyone is well.

Fri, 12 Mar 2004 02:20:23 GMT

Noelle- HO #2, Q-Unit- Pimp Masta, and Natasha(MOI)- HO #1.
[Photo courtesy of Noelle.]

PS: The one in the middle (not that you can really see what he looks like) is my [SLUT IN A GOOD WAY] prom date. :D

Fri, 05 Mar 2004 22:03:40 GMT

I'm at Noelle's now. And she's asleep.
We're going to see Twisted in a little, I wonder what it's about...
Today at Goodwill, it's 50% off

E V E R Y T H I N G.

We're going to go and I'm very excited. I haven't been there in a while, and by 'a while' I mean a week.

Let's hope I find some nice, cheap shit.